Abandoned Love [Review]
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Author: ShadowYin
Story Title: Abandoned Love
Story URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/SYabandoned
Reviewer: ChinYu@sm-melodies.blogspot.com
Title: 5/5
Title tied into the story perfectly
full points =)
Poster/Background: 8/10
I loved the poster. Except it was hard to read some of the text on the poster.
The background was really nice and subtle.
The colors didn't really mash with the mood though. When I first opened up the story I thought it was going to be a very bubbly love story.
Forewords: 2/5
The music really helped add to the theme and mood of the forewords.
You have such an amazing way of writing in first person(I'm envious)
Just reading the first few lines I was hooked. And you added a lot to the story, but at the same time you still had me wondering what happened.
Though, you didn't add anything about the characters.
Plot: 12/15
Since it was a one-shot I will go easy on you. But the plot seemed a little dry. But it was straight foreword and easy to see that the plot was. You answered all the questions I had before I started reading.
But the ending I didn't like. It seemed unfinished and too quick.
Flow: 8/10
The flow was alright. I got lost with the breaks in the text the first time I read the one-shot. But going back and re-reading it, I was able to read it fluently.
The big time skip might be confusing for some, not for me, but they might be asking what happened during the time. And you didn't allude to what had happened. I will give you the benefit of the doubt with it being a one shot and hard to add in what had happened.
Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 10/10
I didn't notice and spelling mistakes.
Nor grammar, and your vocabulary was superb.
full points =)
Characterization: 7/10
You were able to get the narrator's personality across pretty well.
Junsu and Eunhyuk could have been described more.
But its a one-shot, so I understand you couldn't add in every detail about them.
Originality: 7/10
It had that kind of generic feel to it. But you added your own originality with the plot and theme. I know I've seen stories like this before, but yours definitely ranks as one of my favorites. You added your own spin to it.
Writing style: 5/5
I really liked your style of writing. Its similar to mine, so I liked it a lot. There wasn't much dialogue but you described things well. Which I enjoyed. full points =)
Overall enjoyment: 7/10
Other than having trouble reading it at first, the second time around I loved it. The forewords got me hooked and the one-shot was great. Though you need to improve on things you are a great writer. Keep it up =)
Overall score: 71/100